For better or for worse, marriage therapists could be considered veritable experts in the field of divorce. Let’s face it: They’re often a last resort for couples considering pulling the plug on their marriage. Thanks to that, they’re a wealth of knowledge when it comes to understanding what finally puts spouses over the edge—and how to avoid these dire circumstances.
The Huffington Post chatted with marriage therapists to find a deeper understanding of what drives women in particular to the point of no return in their heterosexual marriage. According to Kristin Davin, a psychologist and meditator out of New York City, women often feel taken for granted in their relationship and feel that the marriage is their responsibility entirely.
“For a marriage to work, both spouses need to show up,” said Davin to the Huffington Post. “It requires attention, effort, intention, and strong communication. At the end of the day, many wives take stock of all they do for their families and wonder where their spouse has been.” After years of this imbalance, many women eventually say, “Why bother?”
As with any relationship, open communication is the key to keeping things happy, healthy, and long-lasting. “Good communication skills are such a key ingredient in a healthy marriage,” says marriage therapist Christine Wilke. “So many women don’t feel seen, heard, or validated in the relationship.”